I just realized I never stopped missing him.....

The moment I walked in, he walked out with his fren.....
Our eyes connected as soon as we saw each other.....and there were smiles on our faces....
How long have it been? one week? two weeks? a month?

We met again after not seeing each other for 2 weeks....
"Where are you going?" asked Lee, I just managed to point inwards when he was staring straight at me....not even a "hai" or "there" was uttered....feeling very weird, I continued walking.....

Different than the usual days;
(1) He smiled at me (which usually he wont looked at me long enough to give me a smile)
(2) He talked with me (which usually he wont talk a thing)
(3) He knew what I wanted (which usually he wont take anything for me)
(4) He will choose to sit beside me everytime during yum cha o eating sessions (which usually he will choose a place further than me)

I was like *freeze* for a while there...he was different lately.....very different I do not know how to describe in words....We actually talked to each other....for after......2 months of non-conversation days (if I am not mistaken)....I even caught him looking at me more than usual....

I have no answers for all my question marks....and I cant even figure anything all out....things just kinda not make sense lately....Don give me false hope boy, if you don't mean to do so..... I am a heavy thinker myself, I just force myself not to think so much about u already.... Everytime I see you, there's just something that is reminding of our days together.....I am learning to lock everything inside, not letting anyone including you to see it.....not even wanna break down in front of anyone again.....

When I found out that I was constantly having you in my dreams on and off at night, I realized I never stopped missing you all this while.... I might be making myself busy and tired everyday, but I know I cant lie to myself when my mind is thinking of u in it's half-conscious state..... Sometimes I wake up feeling so tired, I just wished someone can tell me what is all these suppose to mean.....I even mistaken saw another person as him..... When he talked to another gal in front of me, incredibly I felt the "sour-ness" inside of me for the first time....I not sure why but I never felt this before, even when we were together, because I've always put 100% trust on him.....probably it's because the brokened part inside me is aching, and it's so hard for me to trust anymore....it's hurting to actually remembered the sad part....

I have to stop everything, stop my silly thoughts about him, our stories have become the passed....things are never the same anymore, I have to constantly remind myself to stop missing him, his acts lately are jus showing that we can still be friends eventhough we were not together anymore~

Evangelion 2.0

Finally!!

The day everyone was waiting for has finally arrived! Evangelion 2.0! Thanks to Hadri who decided to bring the movie into Sabah, we were among the first group of people who were lucky enough to watch the anime!

We were having our sambal fried rice when Cubex received a call from his friend, saying that the ticket booth has opened. Off we pay the bill and head on to Cathay Cineplax. Upon arriving , some of them were already there, first who came into my sight was Sakuya cuz she was in an angel cosplay costume. She even shouted Cubex's name the moment she saw him. LOL~
Me, Ruwais, Rais and Shin were standing in front of the ticket booth, as Cubex came and redeem the ticket for us, because our seats were booked using his name~ Just then all of his friends were asking him to change to his costume fast! Earlier on, he told us not to call o shout his name later after when he puts on his costume. He wants to be known as anonymous, you'll find out why later.Almost the whole place were crowded with anime fans, some came with their own cosplay costumes, and some came with normal clothes. I spotted Chiaki who arrived later, dressed as Asuka Langley, one of the main character of Evangelion 2.0, which is also my favourite character in the movie. Just when everyone were chit chat-ing and pos-ing stunning for the camera, out came a person in pink bunny suit running all the way from the car park to the cinema lobby! Everyone were shouting and cheering, some even laughed thier lungs out! OMG?! is that.........................okay, anonymous!Sakuya was with the most excited voice, laughing non stop and tapping Cubex's shoulder. The camera hurried aim at them, trying to get the best angle of the scene. The pink bunny suit made everyone notice his huge entrance, quickly stealing everyone's eyes! Everyone wanted to take pictures with him instantly! When we got our chance, we quickly grab the chance to take some pictures with him, you know you cant see C.....I mean, anonymous......with this costume everyday! But I hate my oily sweaty face that night, as we came here right away after PUMP, all of us were actually sweaty+oily+smelly! so not photogenic for any camera! *spoiled*

After waited for some time, it was time to enter the cinema.....we were happy and excited and cant wait to go in, hoping to get the best seats we can find....since it was a free seating event.....Cubex lead us the way and we got some middle row seats.....on the way in, anonymous was even stopped by the cinema workers, we thought "oh o, not this time please....", it turned out that they just wanted to take some photos with anonymous because of his special costume! *I LOLed*

Inside the cinema, after all of us were seated, Hadri made a short speech and thank everyone for making this event happen.....we took some photos for rememberance and for the facebook group before the movie started......
The movie was awesome! For anime fans, I know they enjoyed it very much, and surely would like it for a second screening! For non-anime freaks like me, well, it was enjoying to watch together with the rest of them, and the movie was good, imagined the whole cinema are peoples with the same hobby and interest, and you felt like you are watching it at a place of your own with all your frens......caught Aifer outside the cinema after the movie, so I requested to take a picture with him....haha~ he's always my best buddy~ stand up for me n helped me alot throughout the years~
The screening of Evangelion 2.0 is a success!! Peoples, group photo please!!!

Sorry~ I didn't mean to......

"Don't eat junk food, not healthy, eat me! muahahahaha"
Err, things are getting weird....starting from this conversation....
I thought I was the one who would always said like that because I'm used to talking crapz to everyone, but when people meant it for real, it doesn sound right anymore....

Things were going "owh too well" previously....until one day, the conversations between us are getting weirder n weirder, well, at least I found out something is wrong....At first, we were just advisor partners, due to the problems arising in both our own relationship....we were both having hard time coping with things, therefore, we keep each other motivated and holding on strong by giving advice and sharing some life stories....we were hanging out more and more often, and we both loved to eat! hahaha~

Anyway, we were sitting down and having a drink when suddenly the conversations started to go off to another pace, I have to say a big "NO"~ *hopefully he understands it* then he said "OK" *thank God he is so understanding* We talked things out and I realized I acidentally did it again~ T.T

So Soooorrryyyy, to him and all the other people who got the same misunderstanding as well.....

I don't usually fall easily for someone, the way I treat everyone is the same....maybe I'm too opened in talking, or being too naughty in it, but I called everyone "darling" and "babe"~ sorry if my way kinda be so wrong for you all.... I'll become playful almost with everyone, and when you knew me well, you'll even find out that I can have a bitchy slutty mouth sometimes.....It only happens when I am single lar ok, I don talk like this when I am owned! *gosh*

Is it because after I got my single life back, and everything just turned another way? my single life is when I am at the wildest stage~ I am just who I am, being what I am, don take life seriously cuz it will be so hard to live in it then.... I got my way of thinking, sometimes it's annoying and so wrong for other people who see it in another way, but pardon me, I know what I am doing..... and at least I am not doing anything wrong, it's just my way of enjoying life~

She is right, people just don understand us..... and we always got ourselves in the middle of misunderstandings.....I really didn't mean anything at all....sorry if I had done any mistakes.....we tend to be close to guys easily cuz of our attitudes and behaviours, nothing more than that, it's seriously not because that we liked you or something.....if we happened to fall in love with someone, you will notice our behaviour turning a full 360' degree round and became someone else~

Probably it's time to change a lil of myself, to avoid more misunderstanding in the future, people changed to become a better person, hopefully I can do that as well, I always "hurt" people accidentally without noticing, which is not a good thing~ even I have a hard time trying to understand myself, it's like I'm the weirdest unanswerable puzzle of all~

I don't wanna lose a nice friendship because of a misunderstanding, it's just not worth of anything~